You Can't Have your Cake and Eat it too!

i've always believed that saying, and it helped me understand people and situations more. accepting that i can't have things both ways gives me peace and avoids unnecessary expectations. and we know that unmet expectation is usually the mother of discontentment, leading to depression. and depression is the thief of happiness!

everyday, i am exposed to people's woes, many of such are rooted from not being able to understand this truthful saying. we've always wanted things which are conflicting in nature, sending mixed signals to others and to yourself as well.

So what are some of these bittersweet scenarios?


Work scenes:

• accepting a high-paying job and yet expecting low stress level...
• opting to work overseas (even if there are other options), and yet maintains that incurable homesickness year-in, year-out...
• being in the public biz, and yet steams off anger when a part of their private life is usually feasted on...
• wanting to have a simpler and less complicated life, yet perenially complains of boredom...
• admiring a boss' charismatic ways, and yet disdains his seemingly 'softness' over corporate issues...

Between Partners:

• choosing the one person to be with, yet wanting to be with somebody else...
• getting married, and yet expecting to still enjoy the benefits of bachelorhood...
• opting to stay single (even if there are legitimate choices), and yet yearning to have a family of her own...
• wanting closure in a relationship gone sour, and yet wanting an open-end...
• admiring a partner's manliness, yet expecting him to do emasculating things... (and vice versa for ladies)...
• getting a good-looking partner, and not being prepared for the opposite sex's admiration paving the way to the green-eyed monster!
• wanting a sympathetic and sweet guy, and yet it rubs us off the wrong way when he gets emotional...
• loving his air of mystery, and yet how often we hate it when he does not talk...

And kids:

• training your children to be their own individual personalities, yet unconsciously comparing them...
• loving the 'malambing and sweet' child, and yet is frustrasted for her to be strong and assertive, and a leader in school...

and so on, and so forth...

and if God permits that both good things happen, i recon it as a great gift!!! but it should be taken more as an execption, rather than as a rule.

choose the thing you want to accept, then accept its equivalent drawback, and liberate yourself from unnecessary wrinkles.... as i love to say, "you can't have it all honey!"